How to Make Money on the Internet (a flowchart)

I was thinking the other day about Twitter’s plans to offer an IPO, and this occurred to me…

A Lenten Meditation: Twitter Sucks Like an Old Hoover

This bird has ruined a thousand lives.

I still remember the first time I heard about Twitter. I was eating lunch with some coworkers in ’07, and one of them dropped the name of the then-new site.

“What the heck is Twitter?” I said, wiping mayonnaise from several orifices with my sleeve.

“You know those ‘status update’ thingies you can make on Facebook?” she said.

“Yeah…”

“Twitter is that. And nothing else.”

“That sounds…entirely useless.”