With my left-handed dagger, I stabbeth thee!
Hello there, friend! Do you enjoy my twisted-but-mostly-reverent take on Christian orthodoxy? Then you’ll probably love and/or be indifferent to and/or be deeply offended by my latest piece for Cracked, 6 Filthy Jokes You Won’t Believe are From the Bible! It’s got all the Biblical literacy and sarcasm that you’ve come to expect from this PK trapped in perpetual adolescence! Head on over and check it out.
The Western Branch of American Reform Presbylutheranism 
All classic Bible stories. There’s a lot more interesting and funny (and X-rated) stuff in there than people realize. Always loved Elijah and the prophets of Baal.
Also, I’m glad that led me to find your blog. With an eerily similar background to yours (raised-Presbyterian-now-confessional-Lutheran-with-a-distinct-fondness-for-GK Chesterton), I appreciate a lot of what you say in past posts I’ve skimmed over.
Glad to meet you. Yeah, Chesterton’s one of my favorites. I’ll definitely be in the line to give him a high-five when I get to heaven. 😛
Funny post; glad to find your blog. Here’s a couple other great examples:
Jeremiah 2:23-24
“How can you say, ‘I am not defiled; I have not run after the Baals’? See how you behaved in the valley; consider what you have done. You are a swift she-camel running here and there, a wild donkey accustomed to the desert, sniffing the wind in her craving – in her heat who can restrain her? Any males that pursue her need not tire themselves; at mating time they will find her.
Ezekial 23:19-20
Yet she became more and more promiscuous as she recalled the days of her youth, when she was a prostitute in Egypt. There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses.
True story. Actually, the draft I turned in had that passage from Ezekiel in it, but editorial cut it out — I think mainly to maintain the theme of stuff that was *edited out* of the English Bible.
Thanks for coming by!